Post-Divorce Myths

There are myths about everything:  depression, marriage, divorce.  But I couldn’t find many post-divorce myths.  So yours truly is going to attempt to right this wrong.

Myths I did find:

Blended families are all like the Brady bunch

Your new partner should love your kids like their own

Step-parents should be equal disciplinarians

Love conquers all problems you and your new mate may experience with the kids

We’ll all get along better now that we’re divorced

My additional myths:

No blended family is like the Brady bunch

Your new partner will not love your kids like their own

Step-parents should not be equal disciplinarians

Love will not conquer all problems you and your new mate may experience with the kids

We will not all get along better now that we’re divorced

My point:

Every family and situation is unique.  Of course all blended families are not like the Brady bunch.  Hell, most non-blended families are not like the Brady bunch.  Some partners will not love your kids anywhere near the way they love their own, but some will.  Some of you will get along a whole lot better after the divorce.  Why?

In addition to demographics like age of kids, age of parents, financial and employment situations, and the like, there are other things that make a difference.  Social support, good stress management strategies, forgiveness, gratitude and a lot of other qualities are going to affect your outcomes.  So try to focus on the things you can change, and have the wisdom to know the things you can’t change.  Final myth: you will be miserable forever.  Truth:  divorce won’t kill you, but it will make you stronger. 

Myths which are believed in tend to become true.  George Orwell