Wednesday, May 20, 2015

9 Important Steps To Avoid Becoming A Tech DINOSAUR



So you're divorced, or about to be. Maybe you're 50ish, give or take. If you've shunned technology before, communicating with friends, potential lovers and dating all demand that you move into the 21st century. Here's what I wrote about embracing the new technology:
When I went to college I felt estranged from my parents.
The only way we could communicate was with a landline, which I had to stand in line to use. Now I can shoot texts back and forth with my son, with links to interesting news bits, YouTube videos or music, and pictures of the cats doing dumb things while looking cute.
I get that you want to do things your own way, perhaps what you consider the "right" way. I completely understand. But there are some anachronisms in the 21st century that are just plain annoying, even to a dinosaur like me. Making them will affect your relationships, dating and work life, and prevent effective communication.

Pretty please heed my advice and avoid these nine 21st century faux pas:
1. Don't Leave Voicemail Messages
If you don't know this by now, here's the thing: No one under 35 listens to them. And if you do get a call back, don't expect the person to know what your message said because, and I hate to be redundant, no one listens to voicemail.

Friday, May 15, 2015

8 Ways You Can Be TOO Nice To Your Ex



We see this issue discussed much more in organizational articles than on the relationship side of things. In an organization, if you overplay your character strength of decisiveness, you risk alienating your peers by being overpowering. In a relationship, being too decisive can cause overreliance on your opinions, encouraging dependency from your ex.

Your ex may beg overtly or subtly for the continuation of various behaviors that, while very appropriate for a spouse, cross the invisible boundaries you are attempting to establish. Sometimes it's difficult because the request seems like something you "should" do precisely because it taps into one of your strengths.

Unless you're uber-civilized and still super-good friends with your ex, here are some things you want to avoid, especially early on after a break-up.