Growing up on the kind of romantic
comedies that Doris Day and Kathryn Hepburn made, and Leave it to Beaver,
it's hard to see how I was not flummoxed by the other things I grew up with,
like West Side Story, Gone with the Wind, and The King and I. In
these latter, boy-meets-girl, but they sure don't turn out like a Doris
Day/Rock Hudson, or Tracy and Hepburn film. We didn't know Rock's back-story until
he was dying. Tracy and Hepburn were a not-just-movie couple, never living
openly as a couple. Things were not always as perfect as they seemed.
As Maria Bello concluded in her
wonderful "Modern Love" piece, "Maybe…a modern
family is just a more honest family." With my post-divorce
coaching specialty, I am constantly confronted by people trying to put together
new families, often with pieces that seem very disparate to them. There are the
ex, the new lover, the step-kids from the now-ex-spouse, the ex-in-laws, and
everyone's friends, among others.
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